Men and women on earth die and go to heaven. God comes and says
 
"I want the men to form two queues, one line for the men who dominated their women, and the other one for the men who were dominated by their women. Also, I want all the women to go away so that no man and woman can talk."
 
Next time God comes back, the women are gone, and there are two lines. The line for the men who were dominated by their women is 100 miles long, and in the line of men who dominated their women there is only one man.
 
God gets mad and says, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image, and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons who stood up and made me proud. Learn from him!"
 
"Tell them, my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line?"
 
The man replies, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here." 
 

One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car.

The car broke down.

The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke. We can check the rods."

The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don't think it's getting gas. We shall check the gas tank."

The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system. We shall check the circuitry."

All three turned to the computer engineer and said, "What do you think?"

NEWTON in Romantic mood......

U niversal   L aw   O  f   L ove:

" Love Can Neither Be Created Nor Be Destroyed; Only It Can Transfer From
One Girlfriend To Another Girlfriend With Some Loss Of Money "

F irst   L  aw   O  f   L   ove:

" A Boy In Love With A Girl, Continue To Be In Love With Her And A Girl
In Love With A Boy, Continue To Be In Love With Him, Until Or Unless
Any External Agent(Brother Or Father Of The Gal) Comes Into Play And
Break The Legs Of The Boy. "

S econd   L  aw   O f   L   ove:

" The Rate Of Change Of Intensity Of Love Of A Girl Towards A Boy Is
Directly Proportional To The Instantaneous Bank Balance Of The Boy And
The Direction Of This Love Is Same To As Increment Or Decrement Of The
Bank Balance. "

T hird   L  aw   O  f   L  ove:

" The Force Applied While Proposing A Girl By A Boy Is Equal And Opposite
To The Force Applied By The Girl While Slapping."

Did You Know...

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet. (O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)

(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Do not try this at home. Maybe at work.)

The male pray mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.

("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.

(30 minutes... lucky pig. can you imagine??)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

(Hmmmmmm........)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.

(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.

(OK, so that would be a good thing....................)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.

(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains.

(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.

(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(What about that pig??)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words send it to everyone.

Want to be your own boss

Friendship is not about finding similarities, it is about respecting differences. You are not my friend coz you are like me, but because i accept you and respect you the way you are.

Thank you for touching my life in ways you may never know. My riches do not lie in material wealth, but in having friend like you - a precious gift from God.

FRiEND in different lanaguages...
Iranian - DOST
German - FREUND
Herbew - CHAVER
French - AMi
Pinoy - KAiBiGAN
Dutch - VREND
Mexican - AMiGO

For me.. just simply "YOU"

Stars has 5 ends
Square has 4 ends
Trinagle has 3 ends
Line has 2 ends
but Circle of our friendship has no end...

A daily thought...

A silent tear...

A Constant wish that u r near...

Words are few but thoughts r deep...

Memories of our frenship i'll always keep!!